I feel fat…again.

I don’t know why , but when I saw myself in the mirror today ,  i thought  that I look fat as sh*t.



Sometimes i get the feeling that I have no friend at all. My best friend betrayed me and she was the only one i had (besides my family).

I’m still too afraid to step on the scale. I’m doing workouts several times per week.
I hope i will keep up the good work.


Some people on this planet are just so STUPID. Why?!
Because some of  them dont want to get hurt but they don’t care if they say something that could hurt you.
For example:
I don’t eat anything at school. ‘Cause i just don’t need to. Of course i’m having a big breakfast to have energy.
– and because of that i have to listen to stupid comments like: wanna eat? Or she doesn’t even know what food is.

That is , in my opinion, just stupid and rude.


i remembered something that a friend said to me, some years ago.

it was the time when i was very depressed.

she said to me: ” no boy wants a girl, who is depressed. You’re destroying everybodys mood with your behaviors. ”

That’s not what you should say to a depressed girl.


today, i had my first P.E lesson in this year. And suddenly some girl, me included, started a conversation about being thin and stuff like that. THEN all of a sudden, one girl said, that my upper body is skinny and , read carefully, the rest (like thights, hips, butt) is NORMAL. WHAT IS NORMAL!?!?!

is that a nice way, to say : you’ve got big thighs, hips and butt ?!

you can say voluptuous, curvy or slightly voluminous, but NOT NORMAL.

and the girl who said that, was overweight, so maybe she sees her own bodyshape as normal and that would mean: i’m looking like a overweight girl, with a skinny upper body.

And that is not what i want to be.